Hungry game~

為什麼人人稱好的電影

我可以看的這麼痛苦

這麼看不懂

這麼想睡覺

唉~

還真的不太好

Happy thanksgiving ~~~~

Happy thanksgiving ~~~~~

Tired *10000

Only slept 3 hrs last night 

4:18am

My fabulous 21 years old birthday has ended, with love, laughers with my brothers and sisters<3

They make my upset mood of turning 21 so much better!!!

我的二十歲畫下句點了

。。。。。。

Turning 21 isn't as bad as I thought! 

Just another day to live, love and laugh~

感恩的季節

好感謝神我可以出生在這感恩的季節

讓我總是可以充滿感謝

不管是神還是身邊的人

即將要二十一歲了

雖然不想面對，

時間卻又過的那麼快

想好好感謝讓我長成現在這個樣子的所有人

I love the way I am 

I love how God created me:) 

想打給呱

卻不知從何下手...

Flame of Love

FLAME OF LOVE (by Shin Lin)

Through night and day, I'm all alone
Though I have searched for love but found nothing at all
I'm in the dark, I cannot see
And I've been waiting for someone to bring me hope

Then You came near from everlasting
You sing to me "my beloved child"
Then You came near with arms wide open
And I sing to You, "how I love You, Lord"

Father You're always here with me
Draw me closer to Your side
With the burning Flame of love
Now I'm alive

Father You're always here with me
And You love me as I am
With the burning Flame of love
Forever I am Yours (Forever You are mine)

I hide and hide yet You still find me
I run and run yet You still want me
There's no end to Your unfailing love

Written by Shin Lin © 2011 Love Impact Music


*Every time I hear this song, I want to cry....Father you are always here with me, and you love me as i am, with the burning flame of love, forever I am yours!!

失望／感恩

lynsey 不能陪我過生日....

其實還蠻難過的。

不過，我左想右想還是想過的轟轟烈烈

就當我自私的想當公主一次吧

去LA一個夜景很棒的高級餐廳

然後我想去天文台：）

想要記得

想要不平凡

想要和我愛的人過

我想我會寫張紙條給每一個人

跟她們說感謝他們我長成了現在21歲的我！

Love 

Ptz~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bday: simple, happy, and fun!

Tonight 別家姑娘燒的菜特好吃！很適合我家Ptz 的胃！lolllllll 好開心：）

想兄弟了

敬虔的生活是隨時傳揚基督的最好方法。

今天什麼事都沒做..

今晚想兄弟們了，就約他們四個男生去吃飯，然後晚上玩game,看電影！

好愛他們＜3 真的！

跟他們一起好簡單的開心：）

Bday: 和他們一起過！

好神奇~

神就是這麼神奇
今晚帶小組時
我知道神在我們當中運行
我根本沒有準備出什麼Point
但是當Ethan 說出
當我們交朋友前我們都會看情形
看看這個人值不值得
看看這個人有沒有目的
看看這個人聰不聰明漂不漂亮

我的腦海裡突然馬上就整理出來神要跟他們說什麼話
耶穌為門徒洗腳的畫面

耶穌也知道猶大有心機的在當中做門徒
而且馬上就要賣掉他了
但是耶穌還是為他洗腳, 愛他, 希望他悔改...

所以耶穌說  要我們去愛人就像是他愛我們一樣
我們是不是能像耶穌一樣愛人
就算別人很難approach , 很有心機
很不想要當朋友....
我們是不是還是可以服務那種人???

Andy 說到的 交怎麼樣的朋友可以影響我們的未來

但是我point out 我不是全部agree 因為我們可以成為那朋友 to shape other people's future....
可能有些人我們並不想要交朋友, 希望大家都記起耶穌也去為猶大洗腳, 去愛他
可能你的服侍將會改變那人的未來
你將會是他人生中的好的 influence\....

不光是好的人會影響我們的未來
我們也可以變成有影響力的人
去服事那些難以approach 和我們知道他們有心機的人

所以
神真的是帶領我一步一步把我的Points 弄得清楚然後說出我自己都有一點嚇到的話
有一點像是開竅的一點一點的說出來

最後
我就想到說不要光說說要愛人
而是要做
所以我challenge 大家想一個很不想要去碰的人然後以行動去愛這個人
並且這星期去做!!!
分享要做的這個行為,然後 keep each other accountable!!
然後先踏出這愛和謙卑服事的態度
就算這個人可能會傷害會有目的的接觸你
還是要去成為shape his/her future 的人
就像是耶穌已經愛我們一樣
他早知道我們是軟弱, 是很容易背叛和離棄他的人, 他還是先愛我們, 把最好的給我們
耶穌說我們要愛人如同他愛我們幫我們洗腳一樣!!!

好棒
好棒
還唱了好溫馨的生日快樂歌
celebrate my 21th birthday with my best group ever!!!!!

我知道這個discussion 不是出於我的智慧和能力
而是神幫我把全部的piece together
好神奇~~~ 真的!! 我可以想到這麼多!!!!!!

PTL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! never enough of PTL!! 哈拉路亞


bday: 去 high class place drink and dress up pretty!!!!!

上賊船

現在要四點了才回到家

有一種上了賊船的感覺

打麻將之賊船

十二點跑到人家家去打麻將

結果睡在timothy 家的沙發上
一睡就三點40 分了...............
還是他們打完麻將圍在沙發旁邊叫我起床的
尷尬......

但是累超過尷尬.......

唉〜 我好累

想睡覺了

明天還要上班上課呢

Bday: sleeeeeepp

Nice prayer night with Amy!

:)

Need to sleep now!

Talked to a broken one for 2 hours.... Now really need to sleep...

Tmr 8 am class!

Bday: may the person I love can be loved  and have that true peace and joy:)

看到別人痛

看到別人痛

我好像可以記起我的痛

那種覺得生命再也沒意義的感覺

好難過...

Hurt

How can I help a broken one,

In his world, there is no hope or light but darkness and emptiness...

Praying for healing

Praying for healing 

Lord, I ask you to comfort him !!!!

So many people birthday~~~~ 

What gift should I buyyyy?

In Jesus name, Amen!

Bday: more neat, comforting skill 

Sabbath - I need it

Sabbath in SOP rehearsal ~ this week has been an another chaos week for me. I randomly pass on red light, randomly fall and hurt myself, park extremely bad ...etc. 4 hours of intimate freely worship time with my favorite worship team was the greatest time of the week. People may think I am spending tooo much time relating to this " religion"! But to me, it was most joyful, peaceful, loved, and relaxing time throughout the week. It's not another serving or "church" thing, but my rest, restoring, and rejoicing time of the week. And those music and lyrics keep pounding on my heart again and again. Just loving it! I will keep going to SOP despite obstacles and things. I need it! 這對我來說並不是另一個教會的事工，而是逼我守安息日的地方。那裡我可以單純的遇見神，單純的開口唱歌，在神的愛中休息，重新放下一切重擔和多重角色，只單單是神的女兒。當我需要休息時，神就給我最棒的休息。有我最愛音樂的休息，what can I ask more?

剛睡著了，一下就三點了~

起來洗晚，刷牙

Today such long and resting day~

My dear brother Tim, sister Tracy and Tyra got baptist!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joyful day to see them share their testimony:)) 

Just a starting in their road of following Jesus, a good start indeed!

Bday: read novel whole day~

Meaningful

Love doing things meaningful~

Today we build two shoe box of present for poor girl and boy in other places!

We shop, wrap the shoe box, and write notes with verses, then put them all together:)

Give is much happy and blessing than get! 

I am so blessed by God, so I want to bless and love those kids and make their Christmas wonderful!

The most most blessing gift for them is for them to know God, and right at the moment of knowing who Jesus is, they will get the physical real gift from God!!! Wonderful!

Just give a little can mean the whole world for them and save their souls!!!!! 

So meaningful!!!!

Blessed to have real family in Christ! That's why we fight, we laugh, eat, play, sing, and heart to heart together<3 

More i spend with them, more I enjoy being with them!

I made 米粉湯 for them! Share my favorite with them:)))

Bday: be able to give than receive ! Be able to pass on God's love for me! 

不配

人與人之間真的有時很麻煩..

還好神給我智慧：）

煩惱掙扎了好多天
詢問了好多人關於我應該要怎麼回答Kevin about using MCF's name to sign a room.
我問了自己, 我到底應該怎樣?

每個人都跟我說
不要幫
不要sign
你不知道他是什麼來歷
他為甚麼要做這件事....

可是kevin challenge 我說, his life is all God, how is my birthday big compare to God's work?!
Isn't my purpose is to lead people to God? then why I only care is my birthday and go back to SD?

我好掙扎
一直問神到底該怎麼做
可是神一直讓我保持掙扎情緒
很大的壓力和緊張
不知道該做什麼選擇和到底怎樣是對的
我知道我的內心深處是很想要相信Kevin, 也相信kevin 在做的事工是很棒的
如果   我可以花我的21 歲生日來做事工, 可能很特別很幸福吧?!

到了要跟kevin 見面談話時
我有了一個感動去找AMY 來陪我和Stanley 談
然後我從什麼話都不知道該怎麼說
但是我很清楚Holy spirit was leading me..
我從到底該答應還是拒絕我都不知道
到..... 很好的理解和解釋這整個情況
然後跟Kevin 說將會遇到什麼困難
我說的很clear 我的concern
I am really excited involving God's work,
however if i cant see thanksgiving dinner become some degree meaningful for those Chinese people or me,
then I am not going to stay here.....

Without plan and a team to help make this event really " fun and enjoyable", it is impossible to make them know us and eventually know God.

我們有了很好的discussion
也幫助kevin 了解了更多Chinese culture 和事工

當我們討論完時
瞬間解脫

我第一個字想要說的就是: 感謝神!!!
神給我口才讓我表達
神帶領我說話解決問題就算我原本根本都不知道要說什麼
神在我們當中
我確信

不是我很聰明或是很有智慧
而是神在我裡面幫我帶我講話!!!!!!!!!!!
好感動
好感動
好想要大聲大聲讚美

讓這個discussion time 又有Amy 的support 還可以圓滿的解決
雙方都很了解整個情況


有holy spirit 的同在好棒喔!!
我知道在我不可能不行的事情
神讓他發生的這麼自然.....這麼的自然....

PTL

Bday: a nice group pic from our SG!

後悔

不知道神想叫我怎麼做決定

21歲生日..事奉？
好煩
好被challenge.......
am I really willing to do it for God? 

不為神做去服事人的話

我不知道我會不會後悔

需要安靜

太多聲音..太多了

需要聽到神的聲音

I got 4 points in the basketball game tonight. Although we did not won.....

Ok... I need to sleep..... iphone keep falling on my face and falling asleep....

Bday: swaski ring?! go home? serve people??

受傷

其實我很受傷

很想找人抱怨

4 hours talk

四個小時...

剛剛跟Timothy 講了4 hours的話！

好輕鬆的聊天

We had Hotpot before bible study! 

他說了他被愛情傷的多重

我說起了呱並露出幸福的回憶

雖然傷的很深，

可是記得的都還是那些你的好，和我們的美好。

:) 愛那曾經的你

榮幸那時陪伴你的是我！

Bday: having a new boyfriend to spend my birthday! Beach+hold hand walking+ see moon and stars+ dinner

Hospitality

有時，hospitality can make you really tired....

To a point that I can't wait to sleep now.

My eyes are closing...... 

Night night...

Had a relaxing time with my small group family<3 

Love them so much!

Idyllwild Trip

Blessing time with all the co- workers together in a huge 小木屋！

We worship, we pray, we share, and we fellowship with laughers~

We played bonding game and board games! We played 麻將and enjoy jacuzzi!

We cook and eat together~

We simply relax and joke around! No more serving and "serious" stuff!

We have fireplace with true fire that bring warm air to our room. 

Open, and relax trip with EFCI MCF coworkers!!! These are my family, I love and appreciate each of them so much!!

God is the reason we bonded and love each other:)

21 bday: snowboarding 3 days 2 nights free!!! 

缺乏

我的靈命缺乏

沒有活潑的生命

沒有馨香的氣息

考完試，很糟

連走在路上都有人來關心我要送我個bagel看我心情不好

最近有點糟

越來越少跟天父說話了

也不敢打給媽媽說我考試考不好

今天也沒上班

想找個人說說話都找不到

Chris lead DIG很用心，很有條理，也很知道自己在說甚麼

好想念神

Lord, remind me of my worth in your eyes

Lord, remind me to not talk and cut in other conversation! 

Lord, I want to fall into your hug again. I need more of hugs........

Lord, I miss you!

21 th birthday: I want to worshipping God, experience Him, hears His voice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

慶生

鈺人，我們親愛的小隊員生日！

生日idea: 和EFCI 我的小組員和籃球隊隊友一起？！

我的 21 歲生日

想想老闆要發薪水了
也正式的進入了十一月了

這個月, 我將要變成21 歲!
想想....我想要怎麼樣過這個人生中大概是最後一個重要的轉折點

害怕長大
其實我不想要變成21 的....
我想要永遠都可以很自豪微笑的跟大家說, 我還沒有 21 歲喔~ 還不行喝酒...

Hummmmm

到底要怎麼過我的21 歲呢?
我最想要做什麼事?
我最想要跟什麼人在一起?
我最想要在哪裡?


決定了!
我不知道......
從今天開始到生日, 我要每一天想一個我的21 歲生日願望(當天應該怎樣........)
看看我的心到底最渴慕什麼?


今天:
我的願望是....我不要變成21!!!!! 我不要長大!!!!! 我不要起床!!!!! 我想要永遠期待著我的21歲!!!!! 希望當天可以不要到, 不要過, 拒絕長大的我憂傷了一下.........我不需要昂貴的禮物, 也不需要多棒的美食, 也不要可以喝酒, 我只要更多時間............更多更多更多的時間

我不需要

我不需要藉口

我不需要理由

我不需要休息

恨死自己是個軟弱的人

十分鐘的電視可以看三個小時

說好永遠不再做的事，卻輕易的被撒旦誘惑上當！

我哭也哭不出來

除了恨自己，厭惡自己

討厭一直找藉口騙自己的蔡月貽

大騙子！

你不能好好管理，管制自己嗎？

不能成為一個聖潔的人嗎？

病魔退去!!!!!

今天咳嗽咳嗽咳嗽的起床
好痛苦


我真的生病了!!!!!!
起床後
刷個牙

有一種想要吐的感覺
看看鏡中的我

我好憔悴好病好難受


剛剛做完讀書會第二個chapter
有些人開始長篇大論
有些人開始離題分享......
哀~~~大家有沒有學到阿??!!  有幫助嗎?


有點沮喪
有一點沒辦法專心
謝謝eric 幫我拿的沒有檸檬的檸檬蜂蜜熱水!!
頭腦脹脹的
很不舒服
有一種頭要爆炸的感覺
好像發燒了

可是 星期五的兩個期中考卻不會因為我生病而改期...
God, please help me !! cure me and give me efficiently study time.......I am sooo behind and don't understand anything.

Lord, please be with me and let me rejoice in You even though everything seems so hopeless.
Lord, give me a purpose of the day and to live that purpose to fullness!!!

THank you Lord, seeing my brothers and sisters grow make me really really happy and exciting !!!


:)))) heading to sleep now! Help me wake up early tomorrow,Lord!


病魔退去ˋˋˋˋˋˋˋ散開~~~~~

生病

感觸很多

想寫的東西很多

關於外婆

關於家

關於耶穌

關於呱

關於學習

但我一直流鼻涕

喉嚨痛

又打好多噴嚏

讀了好久的書

又從SD回來

一路上

音樂像往常似的開大聲

我卻沒唱出來

好累，不想說話

只想睡覺

我感冒了

晚安

Count my blessings

God knows I am finding an excuse for not having guests coming over to my house! It's because we don't have Sofa!!!!! But now~~~~~ God gives us a sofa out of no where for FREE!!!! Now I have no excuse for hospitality inviting people come over!!! 

Kevin!! Definitely encourage me in turns of doing ministry and serving people and loving people ! He has no idea what are we taking about, yet he came and play and tried to understand us! Simple, obey, and work beyond!!!he even bought a ktv machine for international student !!!!! I am just so touched and so encouraged! Never thought someone can do this, something so crazy ~~ so patient and so time devouring!

Grandma has no joy but full of complaint and sadness... I am gonna write to her! I need to write to her! Lord! Be her source of joy! Let your holy spirit and your words be her joy and source of life !!! Turns her eyes to your cross ! 

Home sweet home

Always sooo good 

Halloween night

Halloween night with Old friends!!!

Guess who I am this year?

Duh duh duh duh 

Here is !!!!!! 

Sleep now