Sitting here...in the corner of the Cafeteria
looking back, I have been in UCI for 4 years.
說長不長
說短也一點都不短
這四年中, 我想, 我學會花更多的時間就這樣....sitting here
戴上耳機
一首首優美的詩歌
然後 自己享受一人的時光
在這個煩擾做不完的事情的時刻
有著擔心不完的擔心
有著擔心不完的功課, meeting, events, plans, promises.....
然而, 我慶幸的是 : 我學會安靜坐在這裡數算恩典, 享受自己的時間
我不是一個很厲害很聰明很認真很仔細很細心的女生
我真的不是
我今天上課打了一秒鐘的瞌睡, 被老師當著大家的面叫起來...我很懶
我今天買了一大包糖果, 快要吃完了....我很沒有節制
我今天因為功課有答案, 所以很認真地把答案抄完...我作弊
我今天ditch 掉跟朋友去piping吃東西的約會, 因為我不想要吃Buffet 吃太多
我今天無緣無故因為baby的一個玩笑, 很生氣地把他念了一頓...因為我的pride
我今天看了一集suits and took a nap on this table when I am suppose to do my EECS113 HW
我有好多好多....不好的地方
我知道我不配得有個這麼好的電腦
有這麼好吃(有蛋有素雞)的便當
我有愛我的爸爸媽媽妹妹
我有愛我的志勇, 把我捧在手心, 不停地有耐心地逗我笑, 希望我開心
我有辦法念書, 有著UCI的學生證正大光明的考試寫作文交功課
我有愛我的Lynsey, jerty, alice, amy, jessica, .....the list goes on
most importantly, 我認識創造我的主耶穌
想著多少人, 多少人在悲傷, 在哭泣, 在疼痛, 在飢餓, 在被逼迫, 在心痛
我卻可以sitting in the corner
Thank you Jesus...I don't deserve this good.
How can I pay You back?
How can I be better?
It is not what i did anything better than anyone....or tried harder than anyone else
but because You chose me, You love me, You have mercy on me, You are my God, and You never left me.....
Without You, I don't know how my heart would be.....so empty, without purpose and hope...I might die.
day by day....more to come, more to lose
Give me more courage to face challenges, to face more lessons, more realities
Lord, you know how I love about sitting here? because I have peace and I am thinking of the good you have been treating me, and at the same time smiling about the present...and excited about what yet to come.
Right here!
I am enjoying right here!
not anywhere else, not anyone else's lives, not over there on the stage, not over there where everyone claps....it is right here.
In the corner, by myself.
不知道幾年之後再看回來
我是否還是可以這麼grateful for what I have.
感謝神讓我大學差一個月畢業 可以學習安靜 學習一個人獨立
in jesus name I pray, Amen
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